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Screed Life

12.08 2015
Screed Life

Anyone who has the pleasure of screeding an area ready to pave, will be aware that there are many predators lurking waiting to pounce. The following is the definitive list of these nasties,and yes, I am open to further suggestions!

1) Dogs - Man's best friend? Yes, Paver's best friend? No. They have an uncanny knack of appearing just as an area has been levelled and seem to possess a homing beacon for flat areas of yellow sand. Their small foot size allows for optimum  pressure to be focused on a small area and the possesion of four feet allows for maximum disruption to the area.

2) Oblivious fellow tradesman - Nonchalantly walk straight over a screeded area, no matter how obvious. Normally a nasally insencere apology follows but is never guaranteed. Can quite often be intercepted prior to the infraction, as the winnie red in hand lets off a smoke signal from around 20 metres. 

3) Employees - Although thier intentions are always good, the humble employee is probably the most prolific offender of the screeded area. A natural enemy always close to the area and no doubt where the saying "keep your friends close and your enemies closer" stems from. This beast comes in several forms
  - Lead Boots. Looks just like you and me but has the weight of several elephants contained in thier boots allowing dinosaur deep footprints
  - Oblivious Walker. Walks across the screed like an ant looking for a crumb without realizing what they are doing.
  - Long Line Lenny. Sets the string line right where you are about to continue working. Usually likes to leavea heap of footprints and knocked over paver divets to mark thier terrirtory

4) Cats - Here is something they didn't touch on in the musical. Thier urine is rather pungent. You can be minding your own business on a lovely warm perth arfternoon when suddenly you hit a spot where a cat has taken a liking to and you suddenly have singed the hairs off of your nostrils. Normally a good spot to get the offsider to "learn how to screed"!!!

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